![](https://danrodricks.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/eddie.jpg?w=1024)
My late brother Eddie’s birthday approaches. He would have been 67 on September 5. I know that’s not young, but we were not finished being brothers, and I still have a difficult time accepting his sudden illness and loss. It takes up a large space inside me, as I’m sure such deaths affect millions of other men and women. I’ve read some helpful passages about dealing with grief from the loss of a sibling, but recently found an interview video of the actor Billy Bob Thornton most enlightening of all. It takes the deeply personal, self-conscious sadness to a place of honor. If any of you have lost a sibling — especially a younger brother or sister — you might want to listen to this video on YouTube. I’ve transcribed part of it below.
![](https://danrodricks.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/screenshot-2023-09-03-7.56.28-am.png?w=895)
“I have to really force myself to think that things are going to be OK in terms of worrying about my family, myself or one of my friends. … There’s a melancholy in me that never goes away. I’m 50 percent happy and 50 percent sad at any given moment. … I don’t want to forget my brother. I don’t want to forget what it felt like when he died, because he deserves that — that’s how important he was to me. So, if I have to suffer and I have to be sad for the rest of my life, and if I have to be lonely without him… then that’s the way I honor him.”
Dan…. My condolences on the loss of your brother last year. Hopefully, time passing will decrease the pain and enhance the positive memories.
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I’m so sorry for you Dan. I feel so blessed to still have my older sister and younger brother. I liked the message you shared from Billy Bob Thornton. Remember the good times with your brother. What a great happy picture of him! I understand the hole that is there with your brother’s absence. Bless you.
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I’m sorry for your loss. I lost a 13 year-old granddaughter, and no, I’ll never get over it. Of course sometimes I have tears and/or cry for a short time but, in honor of Mary, I don’t let it get me down, I do what she suggested and “get back to your music, Granjan.”
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Received and deeply respected. . .
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Dan, I think 67 IS young in this world now. The loss will always be with you, but the memories of your relationship will be there as well. I never had that kind of close relationship with a sibling. Cherish the fact that you had that closeness. What a blessing.
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Thank you for this reference. My brother would have been 68
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Dan: Take a look at Ted Talks: Beyond Closure by Nancy Berns……
Bob
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yes. Well said I feel the same about my brother who committed suicide.
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